Grieving over strangers

How is it that someone can touch our lives and not know it? How is it that we can grieve for the loss of people we didn't know personally? How is it that someone can be so charismatic and funny and happy, but on the inside they're dying? 

Robin Williams died today, apparently of a suicide. I keep hearing how unbelievable it is. I'm truly saddened by this death, but while at first I was totally shocked, after a few minutes I realized that it was easy for me to believe it. 

I'm not callous, it's simply that I followed his career very closely for many years and had read stories, and heard in his own words, of his problems with alcohol and drugs, so while I saddened, I'm. Or surprised. 

That being said, I ask again how it's possible to feel so sad for the loss of someone I didn't know? I find myself crying at the thought of no more movies, no more stand up, no more TV shows starring this amazingly talented actor. 

He brought so much happiness into people's lives and I feel like there is a giant hole in the world that will never be filled again and all this about someone I never met. 

Worn out

At what point do you realize you've given all you can and are so exhausted you just want to quit? 

I've got that dilemma going on right now. I feel emotionally and physically drained from giving of my time and resources and not feeling like I'm getting anything in return. Shouldn't the people you help want it to be temporary? 

Compliments?

Has anyone ever paid you a compliment and you think back and wonder what the heck they meant by it? 

Lately, people have been saying "you look really nice today" and I say thank you. Then, just a few minutes later, I stop and wonder what the heck that meant? 

When someone says it like that doesn't it make you think "Gee, guess I've really looked like crap lately"? That's what runs through my mind anyway. I know their intentions are good, but their delivery sucks. 

Just yesterday, someone told me I deliver great customer service BUT....  Well, basically it meant that I go too far to make sure the customer is happy. I'm sorry, I thought that was the whole point - keep the customer happy. I've never wondered if I was TOO good at my job before, but now...

Anyway, just another random thought moment - stay tuned for more :)

Women are the "softer" creatures?

All my life I've heard that women are more polite, cleaner, quieter, etc than men. Well, let me tell you what, that's a CROCK! 

You always see (at least on TV and in the movies) that men's restrooms, and/or locker rooms, are these nasty, smelly places that you never want to venture into. Well men, let me tell you what - you've got nothing on women!

My husband and I are members of a local gym, and since I've been going I've noticed that women can be quite nasty! I mean, how hard is it to pick your towel up off the floor? How about taking your nasty used razor out of the shower and throwing it in the garbage can that is RIGHT across from the shower? 

Or, and this one I really don't understand, but why do women put their hair on the shower walls? What's wrong with letting it go down the drain? Do you have any idea how disgusting it is to turn around and see a strangers hair right in front of your face? 

Okay, now that I'm totally grossed out and feel like I need another shower, I'll stop. But women, take note because it's not really that hard to clean up your stuff! 

Everyone starts somewhere

For the first time ever, I've got several photos hanging up for display. 

A fellow photographer helped organize the whole thing and I was very flattered when she asked me. The easy part was saying yes! 

Then came the hard part: which photos do I choose?; how much do I charge?; what do I call them?; and many others. Thankfully, I was able to pull it together and I hung them last night. Here are the images I chose, with their names: 

"Welcome to my Garden" 

"Turning a Corner"

"Road Warrior"

"Duty, Honor, Sacrifice"

"Beauty in the Beast"

"A Little Bit Country, A Little Bit Rock and Roll". 

Hope you like them! 

Faces, faces, everywhere!

I think, because I'm a photographer, I see things others don't. Perhaps it's an order in chaos thing, maybe it's just part I the human brain that looks for the familiar in the unfamiliar. Whatever the case, it happens to me.

For example, lately I've noticed that I see "faces" everywhere in completely random objects. We'll be driving down the street, and I'll notice a car that looks like the back end is a face, or this:

Most of us know what this is. It's the symbol for Microsoft Outlook. I've been looking at it for years, and never thought anything of it. But just the other day, I noticed that it resembled a smiling face. Do you see it? The "O" is an eye, the clock is the nose, and the flap on the envelope is the smile. A totally abstract image, but now that I've seen it, I can't unsee it. 

Am I crazy? How about here? Do you see a face? 

Again, I can't unsee it now. Maybe I'm having a "Beautiful Mind" moment? Anyway you look at it, my mind works differently than some, and I don't think that's necessarily a bad thing. 

Attack of the senseless

Why must people bathe in their perfume/cologne? 

I've wondered, lately, if as you get older, your olfactory senses diminish and you cannot smell as well as before? If that's the case, then why don't people around them tell them they smell? 

I've had two today that were so strong I could taste it in the back of my throat. I enjoy good aromas as much as the next person, but people need to use a little restraint. 

Since I'm on the grateful kick, I'll just say that I'm grateful to be able to smell and taste and hear and see. I'm grateful for all my senses and the fact that they work, mostly like they're supposed to.